It's me, mike hillebrecht

In the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God and the Word was God. John 1:1

“Words fail me.” Have you ever thought or uttered this phrase?

It’s easy to understand since words are merely vehicles used to describe, at the lowest denominator, something we behold; there are any of a number of things which we have no ability to convey their meaning, let alone their significance, in our lives.

No one has the ability to fully describe God. It is impossible to think that we can use any of the present patterns of random symbols to accurately convey to everyone just who God is and what He is in relationship to the entirety of creation. Words fail us.

Consider the writer of 1 John who faced with this difficult task could only ink out the claim. “God is love.” Did words fail him or did he simple select the word which was the lowest common denominator which his readers would be able to comprehend?

All language misses the mark of accurately conveying the essence of thing or event. In New Testament biblical terminology, when something misses the mark, it is called sin. This is not bad or good, it is merely a point of demarcation in a journey.

A relationship with a spiritual being is a journey which cannot be described with the symbols of a material realm. Words fail every time when we are forced to convey the experience which is unfolding in our interior world.

Since we live and function is a material world, we often feel compelled to define our inner experiences with the mystical realm in the form which only the material can relate to. This rarely works simply because words designed to capture the material realm cannot express the expansion of the mystical realm. Another means to explain this would be to recognize that to know a thing is not the same as to be that thing.

Consider this for a moment. Jesus said that he and the Father are one. Jesus even prayed that we would be as one as he and the Father are one. In both of these claims there is a premise where words fail us to imagine not the ability to be known but to be one. You can espouse the reality of God in your confession, but can you be the reality of God in your habitation?

I’m not the first to claim how we have been unable to house the Word of God. Words fail us before an omni-God. Our understanding of a being who is all present, all powerful, and all knowing is at the lowest possible level of communication. We grasp and stumble for the speech to capture what these terms truly mean and their influence upon us.

The priests of Israel often sing from Psalms 19, “The heavens declare the glory of God, and the firmament shows His handiwork.” Watching the sun set in the woods is an inspiring event leaving many with a lack of words to describe it. Yet, through the sights, sounds and smells surrounding us our feelings and emotions are sprinting to capture the fullness of this mystical rendezvous which the mind is unable to articulate.

We just refuse to accept that what we are unable to convey is the Word. God. Love. We can’t add to it by declaring something more and making it ours. It has never been ours – it has always been His. He in us and we in Him – One. Word. God. Love.

It might be possible how when words fail us, we should pause in that very moment and recognize we are in a mystical moment where the glory and handiwork of God is speaking louder than we want to hear.  Word.

We are creatures of action. Our language makes every effort to capture this action through words which in the English vernacular are called “verbs.” Sometimes when an action is not present, we use a verb to demonstrate a difference between action and inaction. Consider the statement, “Bob is sleeping.” The word “is” referring to the action of sleeping, which might not be an action in and of itself, signals the difference between activity and non-activity.

Consider this statement: God is love. This verse found repeatedly in the book of 1 John within the bible drives most people nuts for a multitude of reasons which I don’t have time to address in this limited space. However, I am going to wade into a little bit of this to look at how these three words joined together confound so many.

As I do this I want to begin with this caveat: Language is not perfect by any stretch of the imagination. Therein lies the issue: Words attempt to capture what we imagine but they are inherently incomplete descriptors of Reality as we perceive it. (There is a lot to unpack in what I just declared which I’ll give you time to investigate on your own. I must move onward.)

Love

First off, let’s begin with the end: Love. How do you interpret this word? Most will claim this is an emotion associated with a feeling of happiness. If we were to look at the opposite of love as “hate” there would typically be a threat associated to our survival from this emotion of hate. So, we see here the representation of either happiness or survival in these two descriptors of differing emotions. These are the foundational beliefs of our ego. Our ego is constantly evaluating an action associated to an emotion to be either endangering our survival or bringing us happiness.

There is a multitude of people who have beliefs which see God as that great “fly-swatter” in the sky, just waiting to squash them for the littlest of mistakes. This is the survival mode of their egoic projection onto God. They have no happiness in their relationship with the Creator. To see Him as “love” is off their map of what they call “reality.”

There are also those who happily experience the “love” effect of God. They will confess this to all who will listen, beaming with the enchantment of finding their first true love. Over time this emotion naturally wanes since what can’t be physically seen or felt can create despair particularly in times of suffering and persecution.

What I have briefly described is the difficulty of an emotion. “Love” in both occurrences is an egoic projection based on the individual’s perceptions. These perceptions are not Reality; for a lack of a better term, they are “manufactured” from incomplete data to fit the needs of the ego.

What then is “love” in this verse? Well, we need to look at the two other words to get a better handle on this.

God

This is pretty straightforward. The “omni” God. All-knowing, All-powerful, All-present. The unseen Creator of All.

Some denominations have created a theology for a god who is “up-there, out-there” sitting on a throne waiting to pass the final judgement upon all humanity while ignoring the very words of Jesus who said that the Father is still working today. “Fire and brimstone” theology is what this is called, and while it might have been a popular message back in the day when the true revelation of God wasn’t promoted, it still persists in ministries today where control of the “flock” is the standard operating procedure.

And yet, God has not, and does not change.

Is

This word has the nature of being a verb within this verse. So, ask yourself, “Does this word describe the action of the word “love” or is it pointing to the active opposite description for the word “hate?” Before you answer this question, allow me to offer another question: Why does there need to be an either/or response from this matter?

One of the unique verb-like characteristics of the word “is” is how it relates to the nature of being, or to “be”, which is a verb also. It could be said that this verse might be read as “God be love.” (This would still cause issues with the first group of people, but that is for another day.) How then do we interpret this word in order to gain the fullest representation?

There is a belief within the Jewish faith that might shed a little light on this matter and open a door into another viewpoint not readily considered. There are some Jewish rabbis who have declared that “God” is a verb. If this is the case, the verse should be read as, “Love is God.”

Transcendence

If Jesus’ claim that the Father is still working holds up, then “God” clearly is a verb. Love then no longer becomes an emotion attached to an egoic projection of either survival or happiness. What then does love become? It must transcend into the realm of God and His kingdom.

Consider for a moment the air which you breath. You can’t see it. It is all around you. You know that wherever you travel there will be the same supply of it for as long as you need it. You understand that so long as you can breathe you have the motivation to continue to thrive. In this example, “air” is your god, the substance of your faith. Regardless how incomplete you see it, air is Reality. Nothing exists without air.

Creation, all of it, is a manifestation of love known as God. Nothing exists without love. There is no opposite to love because it has transcended the senses and emotions of mortals into the realm of the kingdom of the eternal omni-God. God, therefore, cannot be associated with an emotion either for survival or happiness. To say, “Love is” has as much weight as saying, “God is.”

I realize that there are a few who will not see any need to view this insight as pertinent to their spiritual development. I celebrate those in this position. However, it is to you who struggle with this matter of “Love is God” that this is directed toward. Until you can sort out this matter in your own psyche, you will not be able to address the next matter presented by Jesus in the verse “Love your enemies.”

You want to be one with the Creator, right? You’re working as hard as you possible can to see this come to fruition, right? Sure, there are a few rough spots which you are working through, people-wise, but as soon as they…things will be cool.

Joh 17:21-23 That they all may be one; as thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee, that they also may be one in us: that the world may believe that thou hast sent me. (22) And the glory which thou gave me I have given them; that they may be one, even as we are one: (23) I in them, and thou in me, that they may be made perfect in one; and that the world may know that thou hast sent me, and hast loved them, as thou hast loved me.

There is no way for this to be sugar coated to make it palatable. Your pride, the protection mechanism of your ego, both natural and spiritual, is keeping you from oneness with All.

Oneness with the Father means oneness with Jesus, who is one with, and within, you. Yet, your pride views this claim as a spiritual trophy to be captured in the long ordeal of living through the long dark night of the soul. You overcame, making you an “overcomer.” Your ego has survived intact. Your pride now has another notch on its belt to show to thousands who will hear your testimony. For it is the thrill of the testimony which your ego relishes. The accolades, shouts of “hallelujah” and “praise the Lord” feeding your malnourished spiritual pride are what you crave, like an addict craves its drug of choice. Face it, under the veil of pursuing spiritual maturity, your ego has devolved into a spiritual zombie junkie, seeking a weekly or bi-weekly meal/fix among the brethren.

Before you cast this aside for being too harsh, I speak from this place of a recovering spiritual zombie junkie. I know the highs and the lows, the tricks, and traps of this lifestyle. I can assure you there is no 12 step programs to pull you out of the dive your in. Crash and burn is the only solution. Why? Death of your ego is what must happen to finally achieve oneness.

Consider this for a moment. Oneness with the Father does not apply just to you. It is already a reality with ALL about you. All creation is one with its Creator. There are no sub-classes, no elements living on the periphery waiting for inclusion. ALL is One. Now.

Pride keeps score. Every score greater or less than One is evidence of pride in operation. Pride seeks delineation as the means to keep score. Greater than, less than, better, worse, higher, lower, black, white, shades of grey, country, ethnicity, gender, age, education, social status, wealth, religious affiliation, on and on it goes racking up points to be elevated “above” and diminish those “below.”

The gift of grace is simply to remedy the pride of your ego, for how every long it takes, for you to come to the knowledge of who you are already One with. So long as you see differences there will be grace to balance what is seen with what can’t be seen with natural eyes. Grace will always keep the score at One.

We are told that no one has seen the Father except the Son who came from Him. We seek oneness with a being who cannot be seen in this realm with natural eyes. Pride only functions within a material realm. Even spiritual pride operates in the material realm.

Delineation of any kind is material through the means of identification. If you can see it, there is a word you can assign to it which will be used to classify it for all who encounter it. The ranking or positionality of this classifying word is purely determined by the perception of each person who sees this either as a threat or an asset to their survival.

The spiritual realm lacks the language the material realm functions with. The spiritual realm only has the Word. All is one with the Word. You, me, us, them are all one in the Word. Be what you already are, not what an ego tries to make you be. The work has never been about you but the rest of One.

I recently had an opportunity to meet with an old friend and get caught up on all the events in our lives that have been happening since we last saw each other. We have known each other for the past two decades and been involved in a number of ministry roles together. It therefore wasn’t a surprise to me when the question came up, “Where are you?”

The simplest answer would have been, “Right here in front of you.” However, locality is never behind the intention of this question. Over our relationship this question has been the barometer to our spiritual development. I have seen all too often how the trouble of measuring development is one-way: my standard, not yours. So, answering this question becomes an art of reading the mind of the other to keep from alienating them with all the truths you’ve had revealed to you, but you know they haven’t even reached for yet.

Before you think that this is deceptive realize how each of us is on a journey in this development of our spirituality. We are at differing stages of maturity within this dance with the divine. While “…the truth will make you free,” we all need to hear Jack Nicholson yelling at us, “YOU CAN’T STAND THE TRUTH!” when speaking into the lives of those on the journey.

Let me make this clear. Just because you attend a church or fellowship doesn’t mean that you are developing spiritually. Actually, these institutions hinder almost all who frequent them simply by the conformity required to maintain community. These organizations are the starting blocks to the race but dragging them along while you run becomes tiresome as they bite at your heels to stay in their lane.

I’ve never hidden the fact that I’m a grace guy. My many posts here are indicative of this truth. Yet just making this claim has differing understandings to many differing persuasions. Some find it encouraging, others find it too simplistic, while there are those out there who find it downright offensive and arrogant. Like I’ve said, it’s a journey for each of us.

At this moment, where am I? There is much to offer here but let me just begin with one word: Namaste. This is a respectful Hindu greeting which roughly translated means, “The god in me recognizes the god in you.” If you take the time to meditate on this, really meditate for several months, you will soon uncover a deep truth: You are god.

I know that many of you are flipping out right now. Go to John 10:34 and see what Jesus had to say about this. Notice also the case of the letters. I’m not claiming (and Jesus is not claiming) you to be GOD but god.

Psa 82:6 I have said, Ye are gods; and all of you are children of the most High.

Many will profess to be “In Christ,” or how their body is the temple of the living God, or how Jesus lives in their hearts. But when confronted with the truth of God being omnipresent, being everywhere all the time, they deny the truth with some asinine statement like, “My body, my choice.”

Being a grace guy means I must diligently recognize the kingdom of grace in all of its manifestation in all of creation. The Father is still working today just as He has been since the beginning. He never changes. Namaste forces you to admit this truth to all you come in contact with. Herein then lies the real meaning of grace. If you can’t see god in front of you how then can you know god inside of you? Keep meditating on this and you’ll come face to face with the real question: Where are you?

Some of you are going to take what I am about to say personally, which is fine. If the shoe fits…

YOU think too much.

Look, I’ve been there and am still doing it – in moderation to some degree. However, I am also very aware that the only reason that I am often doing it is simply to satisfy my ego. Yes, that is correct. We think, and over think, merely to soothe our fragile egos.

Admit it! YOU have no ability to be humble. Life is all about YOU and what makes YOU look good, even when everything, and everyone, around YOU is plunging into the abyss of the crab pot we call life.

For those who are not familiar with the nature of a crab pot, YOU need to read this. When a fisherman goes out to catch crabs, the catch is taken out of the traps and placed into a holding tank or pot. Now crabs are notoriously known to be free spirits in their activities until they are placed into a collective. Something happens to the crab when it is forced to share space with other crabs. If a crab makes an attempt to crawl out of the pot, the other crabs will intentionally pull that crab back into the pot, sometimes over and over again, until it stops trying to leave. Then, when another crab begins to express the same desire for freedom, the collective performs the same suppressing routine.

YOU are the crab trying to break free or YOU are the crab trying to keep everyone in the same pot. Hence, YOU think too much – freedom or containment. This is what feeds your ego.

In the current movement of spiritual attainment there exists a process called “mindfulness.” Its purpose is to release a person from the inner focus on self and open up avenues of realization to the world which surrounds them. In other words, YOU need to quit being transfixed on YOU and look at the world around YOU and what it is going through despite YOU being there. At some point, the intention is for YOU to become “mindful” of others. Good luck with that! Remember, YOU don’t have the ability to be humble just as the “other” doesn’t have the ability either. Ego doesn’t play favorites unless it is YOU.

The apostle Paul encouraged the collective in Corinth to remember that they have the mind of Christ. And to the collective in Phillipi he exhorted them to “… let this mind be in you…” and then immediately followed it with, “…thought it not robbery to be equal with…” It is what follows this claim that YOU have an issue. So, let’s deal with that now.

Remember Jesus, the man? According to the fourth gospel, the man, praying through the mind of Christ, asks for all of us, across the span of time, to be ONE with the Father as HE and the Father are ONE. So long as there is YOU, there is no ONE, simply because YOU rob God! Truth hurts YOU as it set you free.

Who is all powerful, YOU or God? Who is all knowing, YOU or God? Who is all loving, YOU or God? What prevents YOU from being equal with God, just as Paul claimed about the man, Jesus? YOU know, right?

What if YOU are simply one, from a global multitude of expressions, of who God is? What if YOU forgot this – no – elected to ignore this? What if this mind in YOU is in direct opposition to the ONE mind simply because YOU think there is more than ONE mind? What if YOU are merely a thought, an illusion, a projection of a fractured ego seeking to return to ONE whole?

YOU need to be mind-less of YOU to be the ONE mind known in Christ. The egoic thoughts of YOU will always be a stumbling block to the mind of Christ, a mind which you already possess and lives inside you. This is simply because the desires of the ego are not the same as the desires and affections of Christ. To the ego, life is all about YOU. With Christ, it is all about the Father and the oneness they share. This ONE-ness is what fills the Christ-mind, the thoughts, and the subsequent actions from those thoughts. YOU want no part of this or do you?

How would you respond if everyone you know, and those who you don’t, believed and proudly confessed how you were a blood-thirsty warrior intent on destroying anyone who disagreed with what you have deemed to be the truth? You might pass it off as a one-time event and not let it ruffle your feathers. However, consider how this narrative about who you are is repeated every day, throughout the world, in the multitude of tongues from over 7 billion people at all hours of the day, generation after generation. Sure, everyone has the right to express their feelings and beliefs about someone, but does this also apply to your closest family members, people who grew up with you, have first-hand knowledge of your character and actions and how they have evolved with you until today?

You know in your heart that what these people are saying about you is a lie. But what are you going to do about it? Tell all of them, over 7 billion, the truth? Are you just going to ignore them and let them live in their deception? What about those closest to you who you interact with daily? How will you respond to a son, daughter, husband, wife, parent, co-worker, friend, doctor, even your pastor when they expect you to wreak bloody vengeance at any moment you deem fit?

Don’t think for a moment that this is just a thought experiment designed to broaden your mind. This is an actual on-going process which is being and has been conducted 24/7/365 days since mankind began to conceive who, or what, God is. It has never mattered what religious dogma or doctrine has been promoted to the dominate position in the world, the idea of capturing God in a form favorable to the current agenda of mankind has always been a priority, regardless of the truth of the matter.

So, let me ask the question: What is your agenda with God? You have a purpose whether you know it or not. You are trying to get something to give you an advantage over those around you. Maybe it’s an increase in finances; a better job or favor with your boss; a new home or car; a husband, wife, or children; better health for yourself or a loved one; intervention in the life a family member who is dealing with addiction, depression or is suicidal; political aspirations for your community, state or nation; social justice for any of a number of issues being presented as “deserving.”

Considering all these I’ve highlighted, and those I haven’t, but you know about, the prevailing image of God for these agendas is one of a vengeful warrior. God will “fight” for you, subdue and slay the enemy on your behalf. Yes, blood will freely flow as your enemies cry for mercy from “your” god. Yup, you read that correctly: Your god. Selah.

Now I understand how there are a number of scriptural passages which declare God to be a warrior, yet there is testimony which claims that no one has ever seen God because to do so would result in death. Still, Jesus boldly claimed, “…The Father and I are one…if you have seen me, you have seen the Father,” however, no one seemed to die looking at Jesus.

Jesus was pretty clear that he was not a warrior, a fact which was very unpopular with the masses who believed he had come as “their” Messiah to free them from the bondage of Rome. This warrior motif about Jesus even persisted long past his ascension and is even crafted into the end-time vision of the revelator who saw him, upon a white horse, tunic soaked in blood, a sword proceeding from his mouth striking down the enemies of his kingdom.

Jesus proclaims, “…I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except by me.” I hope you realize by now how the prevailing thought of the God Jesus called “Father” was, and still is, one of vengeance and retribution against all who were not of the house of Israel, the offspring of Abraham. Let’s take a moment to follow this warrior motif projected onto Jesus and play out the events surrounding his death, resurrection and ascension.

Jesus is betrayed by a follower; arrested by the temple guard; falsely accused by the priestly class; abandoned by his disciples; punished by the Roman occupiers; offered freedom but denied it by the general populace swayed by the priestly class covert influence; crucified by the Romans; hurriedly buried in a tomb in order to be observant of the holy customs leading up to Passover; he arises on the third day and calls together his disciples to meet.

You’re a warrior, right? Just like Jesus, right? What is your resurrection agenda? Do you exact retribution on the disciples who abandoned you? Or maybe you take out your vengeance upon the priestly class who falsely accused you and then employed the Roman occupiers to have you murdered? Surely there is the need to cleanse the people of anyone who falsely pronounced judgement upon you rather than cry out for your freedom? Certainly, vengeance is due to the Romans who nailed you to a cross and thrust a spear into your side. These are all warranted actions of a warrior-god, right?

No one comes to the Father except by the way, the truth and the life.

Jesus and the Father are one. How Jesus responds is how the Father responds. “Forgive them Father for they know not what they do.” “God is love.” “…not my will but your will be done.”

The foundational training of religious studies is that God is ever present, all knowing and all powerful. This is truth. Jesus proclaimed that the kingdom of God is within each of us. It isn’t coming some day when you hopefully get your act together – it is here already, right now, wherever you are and in whatever condition you are in. It will never leave you, ever.

A kingdom is a place where a king abides. It follows the king. Wherever the king resides, his kingdom is present. Again, Jesus proclaimed that the kingdom of God is within each of us. At no point did he claim that you had to pray a special prayer for this kingdom to come. Neither did he claim that you needed to confess all your past foibles, great and small, to experience the present reality of this kingdom. Stunningly he never once claimed that the presence of the kingdom was any different for Jews, Gentiles, Greeks, Buddhist, Hindus, pagans, atheists, or any other occupant of this planet. The king is NO respecter of person throughout his entire kingdom! All have been included – no invitation to join required.

Let me take a moment to address this no respecter issue. The kingdom is in all, making the king in all too. There is not a little bit of the king in one and a little bit of the king in another, so on and so on. All of the king is in all of the people. I trust you recognize the implication of this truth: The king doesn’t have any enemies in his kingdom. If no enemies, then being a blood-thirsty warrior king is…

So, if you are asking the king for relief from another, the king has no choice but to offer the same relief to the one you’re praying against. Is it possible that so many prayers are not being answered merely because there are multiple sides praying against the other that the best solution is not to advance one agenda over another until unity of thought prevails?

I recognize that this is not what some of you have been told and taught over a lifetime of indoctrination. Consider the past is just like water under the bridge. You are never going to collect all of it again exactly where you crossed and then purify it. Move on within a new thought, a changed mind, a truth that leads your way in a kingdom you are already a part of. I’m not going to tell you it will be easy because your embedded thoughts are conditioned to act as triggers when a new paradigm arises. Taking an old, conditioned thought captive is arduous if you have never known anything different. This is why Paul reveals that we have the mind of Christ. It is a mind which is all-knowing, all-powerful, and always present. All means all. You decide what this means if you have the mind to do so. Herein lies the way to the Father, the fount of all life. It is not as inconceivable as you might think.